Pride and Prejudice: There’s More to You Than Just “Being Gay”

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Hello Blogosphere! My name is Isaiah Frisbie and I am honored to be the writer for Pride and Prejudice. As a freshman myself, I came to Brown with a number of questions, many of which were answered within a matter of weeks while others remain open-ended. Perhaps one of the more enduring questions, one that may continue to be answered throughout the entirety of my Brown career, is how my own sexuality will affect my college experience. So, I have taken it upon myself to use this blog to contribute any kind of insight that I can about LGBTQ life at Brown and hopefully, in some way, help any student, prospective or otherwise, put some of those nagging worries to rest.

One of the many things I have learned during my time at Brown, apart from utilitarian viewpoints on morality and the controversy over globalization’s effect on international relations, is that…brace…yourself…sexuality isn’t everything.

I know. I know.

A blog about sexuality blatantly telling its readers of sexuality’s own insignificance?

Now before we all start having some kind of existential crisis or contemplating whether or not I was one of the co-writers of Inception (ignore this as it was a failed attempt to be witty), let me elaborate.

Within the intricate framework of shameless plugs I have woven in the past two months of blogging, I am sure I have at least hinted (again, failed attempt at sarcasm) that Brown is an exceptionally accepting and open-minded community. One never feels, at least in my own personal experience, that any part of them has to be stunted or hidden out of fear of some kind of archaic ostracization.

One is free to be who they are and simply doing so is the norm. Therefore, although there is a clearly apparent emphasis on LGBTQ issues on campus, being gay at Brown isn’t something that elicits the same look of surprise or gasp of shock that we expect it would. This isn’t to say that it isn’t important, clearly evident by the handful of resources specifically for LGBTQ students. What I have had the pleasure to learn here is that sexuality does not define you. Sure, one would use the term gay to identify themselves but never would someone agree that such an identity is the limit to their identity as an individual. I am able to walk around campus feeling completely free to share my sexuality without the mindset that it is the most controversial or shock-worthy aspect about me.

I honestly hope I am conveying this point effectively because I feel it’s one that deserves attention.

Here’s a quick run-down to sum it all up.

Yes, my sexuality is important and Brown provides its LGBTQ student body with a number of resources to accommodate their needs. However, one comes to find that, although important, their sexuality is not the only nor is it the most important aspect of their identity or personality. One is free to feel as though being different is “normal.” Because of this balance of simultaneously emphasizing both the importance and insignificance of sexuality, LGBTQ students, at least in my own case, are free to start finding new things with which to relate and different ways to identify. Sexuality is not meant to be some kind of constraint by which and only which people can consider themselves. Now as a college student, I feel more capable to broaden the way I look at myself.

Try this notion as a final attempt to clarify any lingering confusion this article might have created.

I am not anyone’s “gay friend.” I’m just a friend that happens to be gay.

If you have any questions, comments, or suggestions about what I should post next, please don’t hesitate to email me at isaiah_frisbie@brown.edu.

 

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